Writing the Ship

So as many of you may have noticed--or not--I haven't posted anything to New Problem Tuesdays in nearly a year.  In case your curiosity may be overtaking you--and if it isn't, then let's pretend anyway--there are many reasons for my hiatus.  Between the 9-to-5 grind, family life, my other side hustle (i.e. music) and various other distractions, the usual suspects can easily be lined up and questioned.  However,there is a more heinous and culpable culprit who has prevented me from sharing one of my God-given talents and passions with you all: me.

If you've been a faithful follower of this blog since its inception in 2013, then one thing is clear: very few of my posts are short on words.  Because I have always allowed others to speak more than I do, everything that I want to say in face-to-face discussion vastly manifests itself in my writing.  With that said, it takes a lot of time and energy to get out all of my thoughts--often feeling like I still leave points on the field.  Thus, mental fatigue sets in trying to say things pursuant to my unique perspective. The thought of writing just ONE blog post let alone three to four often causes my brain to have a narcoleptic episode, consequently leading me to shut down and crawl into my jumbo-sized cubby hole.  So between the massive amount of police brutality cases, the shenanigans with the upcoming Presidential election and, of course, my favorite sport in the whole wide world, trust me when I tell you that I've had a whole lot to say about many topics; I just haven't felt like writing about any of it.

Then there's a matter of promotion.  I can write all of these great and elaborate posts until I develop Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, but they mean nothing if I have no audience.  Hence, it comes down to gaining more followers on Facebook, Twitter, Google Plus, etc. It involves strategically posting at the ideal time of day to catch the most traffic and attract as many new supporters as possible.  Moreover, it takes occasionally revamping the presentation and constantly figuring out the best stories to write about to keep the reader's interest locked and loaded in a world where my son's attention span may be better than someone knocking on 30.  I realize that as much as I want to write about sports all the time, I have to broaden my subject matter because 1) not everybody is as passionate and hot about a dumb behind kneel down in a battle for NFC East supremacy as I am and 2) limiting myself to one genre of writing doesn't represent all of my interests.

So when you combine the two aforementioned factors with a perceived lack of support, then it feels utterly pointless to waste my minuscule amount of cyberspace with sentiments that don't provoke much conversation or discussion.  Believe me, I can listen to myself talk all day; I do it all the time and believe that I'm my own best listener other than God.  (Call me crazy if you want to, but I'll own that and bet dollars to donuts that you do it, too.)  However, I allow myself to be so frustrated by assuming that people aren't that interested in my point of view that I devalue myself. I write myself off by not writing at all, and that is grossly detrimental, counter-productive and unacceptable.

So in taking that next step toward consistency and refusing to wait until the New Year for a new post, this is part of a proclamation to myself to write no matter what.  This blog was born out and is a firm reminder of the need to speak more and be silent less.  It has been sustained not just because a few A1s since Day 1 have believed in me, but because I believe in me and, more important, I believe in what God has given me the courage and strength to do.  Therefore, know that when I'm posting these soliloquies, this is more about therapy, preservation and maintenance than it is about likes, shares and comments. This is more about the rebirth of a floundering writing career--one that I abandoned way before February of last year when you all last heard from me.  At the end of the business day, the biggest problem on Tuesdays is me and I gotta deal with it.