Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 16

With Christmas now in the rear view mirror, this introduction could easily qualify as a "Plus/Minus Take of the Week".  The plus: football fanatics everywhere were treated to a Christmas Eve full of football; it was like being able to open presents at midnight instead of waiting until 9 a.m. long after Santa done crawled his dusty behind back up with milk in his mustache and Christmas cookie crumbs in his beard.  The minus: although they had two pivotal division matchups with playoff implications--one being in prime time--they had to sacrifice most of Christmas Day to the NBA.  Either way, outside of celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ and spending time with family and friends, there aren't too many other things I'd rather do than watch football on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  For some teams--as well as some coaches and GMs who will get their pink slips before Black Monday--jolly old St. Nick had lumps of coal.  However, if you were like the first team featured in this week's edition, then you felt like you got straight As and minded your manners at the 11th hour...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 15

Jeff Fisher can credit himself with starting a trend: when you're an average or putrid head coach, teams aren't waiting until the end of the season to relieve you of your duties.  If any of my fellow football fanatics think or feel anything like I do--especially if your name is Eric Dickerson--then you were thrilled at the news early last week of the Rams cutting ties with Mr. "7-9 Bullsh*t".  In five long and painful years, Fisher amassed a grand total of 31 wins, 45 losses and one tie and not one of those seasons was above .500.  In fact, with a lifetime record of 173-165-1 (.512) and without a winning season since 2008, he had the opportunity to break the all-time record for losses held by Dan Reeves (190-165-2, .535) had he stayed one more week in the position because the Rams lost that game, too.  (Surprise, surprise.)  Despite helping to build a reputable defense with Aaron Donald, Michael Brockers, Alec Ogletree and Robert Quinn, the Rams have trotted out one of the most putrid offensive units over the past five years--being no better than 23rd, residing in the bottom five for four years straight, being the worst offense since last year and averaging 18.3 PPG during his tenure.  Perhaps NewsOne Now's Roland Martin kept it the most candid:  "If y'all wanna understand White privilege, how does Jeff Fisher still have a job?  He's had six winning seasons in like 22 years...they gave him a two-year extension, and how does he reward them?  They go out there and get blown out 42-0!"  Speaking of blown...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 13

When doing this week's edition of "Views from the Nosebleeds", the natural choice of a lead story was last week's senseless murder of former Jets running back Joe McKnight in an alleged road rage incident with 54-year-old Ronald Gasser at an intersection in Terrytown, Louisiana right outside of New Orleans.  However, because of the racial, social and political layers involved, I decided to make that a post unto itself.  Furthermore, as a Black man in America whose spirit has grown weary from constantly being reminded the lives and memories of people who look like me don't matter--see the mistrial in the Walter Scott case as further evidence--I have too much frustration in my heart to take away from what is intended to be a half-serious, half-light-hearted series about my favorite sport.  Since these posts are already long enough on their own, there is plenty of good and not-so-good football to discuss, so let's kick things off with two not-so-good, but-not-as-heavy stories...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 12

Although I looked forward to family coming from Pennsylvania and enjoying Mrs. Scribbler's scrumptuous cooking, one of the biggest incentives to toiling through purchasing a car note's worth of food and almost passing out from heat and exhaustion while grocery shopping was being the stereotypical patriarch and watching Thanksgiving Day football all day long.  However, despite not being a card-carrying Skins fan anymore but still having plenty of residual Burgundy and Gold blood running through me, "Dallas Week" still annoyed me because normally-grating Cowboys fans become even more insufferable--especially when their team is not only winning this year, but also have the league's best record.  In fact, I was bewildered in finding out three of my family members are Cowboys fans, but they're the less obnoxious types who I can tolerate more than the vast majority of them.  (I still need holy oil for our doorpost.)  Unfortunately, I swear I heard a janitor once the clock struck triple zeros, saw an "F" by the score and I wasn't pleased--knowing the onslaught of incessant trash talking was on the horizon in what hasn't felt like a true rivalry since the early 90s. As much as I could stall, let's address the inevitable...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 11

Although I had to correct Big Dadi Scribbler on a few historical facts--he thought the Browns played in the NFC at some point since the AFL-NFL merger when they've always been in the AFC--I had an intriguing conversation with him about old school football.  As a football, softball and track and field star for Coolidge High School in Northwest D.C., one of the things he noted was how rough defensive backs were against receivers--so much that one of the biggest reasons wideouts would get alligator arms was because of the ferocious hand checking before a lot of the illegal contact rules were imposed.  In fact, he started off as a receiver before making the transition to defense, a welcomed change in which he inflicted the same abuse on opposing receivers he endured on offense.  However, perhaps the most interesting facts I never knew about my dad when constantly hearing how legendary he was as an athlete was he was also a kicker and a punter, forcing several touchbacks on kickoffs and leading the league in net punting average one season.  Considering Week 11's struggle kicking as eleven misfires led to the most amount of failed extra points in a week since 1966, I'm sure several teams would've loved to have a sure-footed boot like the Scribbler patriarch.  Now that I've done at least two or three shameless plugs for dear old dad in one calendar year, let's discuss some new school football...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 10

Frankly, I don't show frequent love to NFL place kickers because, like many football fanatics, I tend not to regard them as "real" football players.  I often hate how a game can swing on the foot of a guy who only comes out for kickoffs, extra points and field goals--especially with the tough year kickers are having since the extra point extension to the 15-yard line last season.  Well, if you ask Chiefs play-by-play announcer Mitch Holthus--who has long been one of my favorite radio network announcers--Cairo Santos might as well have been Moses, King David and Jesus Christ rolled into one.  When their visit to Carolina was primed for overtime tied at 17, Panthers receiver Kelvin Benjamin handed Marcus Peters and the Chiefs' opportunistic defense an early Christmas present via a fumble on Carolina's 24-yard line with only 20 seconds remaining in regulation.  As Santos nailed the first walk-off of his career, Holthus' call was one for the ages:

This would be the biggest kick for Santos...and all of Brazil holds its breath...17-17...it's now four seconds they're saying left in the game...ball in the center of the field...on a 37-yard attempt...placement is down...Santos' kick...he lines it up AND THAT BABY IS RIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE!  É SULCÉ É BOA!  É SULCÉ É BOA!  AND ALL OF BRAZIL AND THE CHIEFS KINGDOM REJOICES WITH AN INCREDIBLE, IMPROBABLE VICTORY ON THE ROAD!

First and foremost, thank God I kept my TuneIn Premium subscription because I wouldn't have located this audio otherwise.  Second, when I do something even remotely as amazing as that, I need Mitch Holthus on speed dial and speaking Portuguese is purely optional   Third, that's the best radio call I've heard since 98.5 The Hub color analyst Scott Zolak gave us, "BRADY'S BACK!  THAT'S YOUR QUARTERBACK!  WHO LEFT THE BUILDING?!?!  UNICORNS!  SHOW PONIES!  WHERE'S THE BEEF?!?!"  With that, fellow pigskin enthusiasts, let's recap Week 10...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 8

If you're an avid sports fan, then this was your week.  Beginning of the World Series between the two franchises with the longest World Series championship droughts in the Cubs and Indians.  Beginning of the 2016-17 NBA regular season, which saw a loaded Warriors squad get their lunch money taken by the Tim Duncan-less Spurs to the tune of 129-100.  While very few people I know are checking for NHL action this early in the season, football nearly took a back seat in the midst of a smorgasbord of intriguing sports options until a Saturday night thriller in Tallahassee with No. 3 Clemson outlasting (now) No. 19 Florida State, 37-34.  Not to mention Fox being the beneficiary of a quadruple-header on Sunday between three back-to-back NFL contests and a do-or-die Game 5 of the World Series for the Cubs.  So during a weekend which featured eight games decided by eight points or less, three overtime games and the first consecutive weeks of back-to-back ties since Weeks 12 and 13 of the 1997 season, there was a lot to love and hate about Week 8...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 6

One of the things which has helped me to overcome an emotionally trying period of my life outside of music has been football.  It's like the home team knew I was going through it and needed to get excited for my favorite sport in the whole wide world because after starting off terribly at 0-2, they've ripped off four straight wins and at least look like contenders in the NFC East race.  Granted, seeing the Capitals and Nationals flake out in early rounds amidst Stanley Cup and World Series talk, respectively, doesn't give me much hope for their playoff aspirations, but the turnaround is good nonetheless.  I'm frankly happy the NFC East is not the "NFC Least" as it had been for the past several years as no team is under .500, making every win absolutely critical.  I'm so pumped about the NFC East's comeback that, although I was cheering for the Packers to beat the Cowboys, it's hard to knock two rookies as impressive as Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott; heck, I marveled at many of the throws Carson Wentz made and he was making them against the home team!  While many of the overall matchups throughout the league aren't always alluring from week to week, it's still not an all-out blah fest and Week 6 continued that trend...

Views from the Nosebleeds: 2016 NFL Regular Season, Week 2

I came into Week 2 of NFL regular season action on a high from a solid Saturday in NCAA football.  Although all three of my favorite teams won big--including Michigan storming back from being down 14 points in the first quarter at home to beat Colorado 45-28--my favorite game of the day was between two unranked teams, Maryland vs. Central Florida.  After UCF QB McKenzie Milton lost his third fumble of the game in the second overtime in a tie game at 24, Maryland freshman QB Tyrrell Pigrome had the daunting task of filling in for the injured Perry Hills.  However, there are few plays better in someone's first snap than to get a 24-yard TD run to win the game 30-24 in double OT and push your team under your first-year head coach DJ Durkin to 3-0.  Yeah...seeing another one of my favorite college football teams win in dramatic fashion definitely got me ready for football on Sunday.  So enough about the kids and let's talk about the grown man's game...